雅思大作文论段与让步反驳段的顺序问题

时间:2020-09-01 02:10:01

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雅思大作文立论段与让步反驳段的顺序问题

广大烤鸭们都知道雅思大作文整体由三个部分组成:开头段——主体段——结尾段,其中主体段又分为立论段(支持自己观点的段落)与让步反驳段。

这两段是两个对立面,是对于题目中的观点所产生的正反两个不同方面的看法,通常是决定大作文分数高低的关键段落,因此,里面有很多细节问题值得提醒大家注意。

笔者在实际教学过程中发现,很多同学在自己练习的时候都习以为常地把立论段写在让步反驳段之前,这种理解显然是过于笼统,并不适用于所有的题型,那么,这两者的顺序究竟应该孰先孰后? 笔者今天为烤鸭们做了一个具体分析。

例如:

1. In some countries,young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this. ( C5T2 )

在这篇经典的双边讨论题型中,考官所持的立场是支持gap year这件事,文章的布局是先写出立论段,即在主体段第一段先讨论了他支持的观点gap year这件事的advantages:

1)have a broader view of life and better personal resources to draw on.

2)They tend to be more independent.

然后在主体段第二段先让步讨论了gap year这件事的disadvantages:

end up never returning to their studies or finding it difficult to readapt to an academic environment,

然后在这一段紧接着列出反驳部分:

But overall, I think this is less likely today, when academic qualifications are essential for getting a reasonable job.

2. Some people believe that children’s leisure activities must be educational; otherwise they are a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree? (C3T1)

这道题考官所站的立场是“不同意孩子们的休闲活动也需要有教育意义”,因此整篇文章的立论段就是在论述“孩子们的休闲活动也需要有教育意义”这个观点的不正确。

让步反驳段应该是先讨论“孩子们的休闲活动也需要有教育意义”这个观点的合理性然后再来驳斥掉。

然而考官范文的顺序却是先写了:

as access to the best education and best jobs is becoming more competitive, and then it is true that children have to make the best of their study time when they are young(让步部分的观点). However, the parents who do not allow their children sufficient free time for leisure activities are misguided.(直接反驳)

然后再详细论述个人观点:孩子们的休闲活动需要玩耍

1)It is important to remember that children need to develop skills other than intellectual ones.

2)Many children form strong personal relationships with the friends they play with, and without the opportunity to do this, they could grow up emotionally immature or unformed.

由这两篇范文可见,一般情况下,立论段和让步反驳段的顺序是灵活的,谁在前面都可以,但他们之间的对立关系始终不变。

然而,当题目中出现极端表达时,如everyday, everyone, all, only, 或否定词:do not, cannot, will not等。

2017 年 1 月 21 日=2014 年 1 月 9 日

The best way for the government to solve traffic congestion is to provide free public transport 24 hours a day 7 days a week. Do you agree or disagree?

2016 年 9 月 10 日

Many customs and the traditional ways of behavior are no longer relevant to the modern life and no worth keeping. Do you agree or disagree?

题目当中的绝对词常常是我们反驳的靶子,这个特点决定这种题型的常见回应方式是先让步后立论。

这就好比你拒绝一个不喜欢的告白对象,高情商的拒绝方法是先承认对方的好(让步部分),然后再委婉拒绝(直接反驳),接着再列举你们不合适的理由(立论段),与结尾段“拒绝的意味”一脉相承,逻辑上也较为通顺,这种方法比起那些直男式的拒绝方法(直接说出你们不合适)要显得有温度得多。

Discuss题型有非常明显的对立双方,最常见的形式是some people think…while other people suggest…这种题型的写法可以是“一边倒”(只支持其中一方的观点),也可以是“墙头草”,即对双方都表示支持或都表示反对。

在这种“墙头草两边倒”的情况下,段落之间的连接词仍用however,反驳前一段的说法就显得有失偏颇,就没有反驳部分了,因此两个主体段的位置可以互换。

e.g. (C8T1)

利弊分析/优劣势题目(advantages and disadvantages)相对比较少见,通常作者是有倾向性的,无论优势劣势,你倾向的那一段就是立论段。这个特点决定这种题型的和其他题型一样可以先让步后立论。

因此,综上所述,在没有绝对词出现的题目中,立论段和让步反驳段的顺序是灵活的,而一旦出现绝对词,则最好先写让步反驳段,再写立论段,这样更为符合西方的逻辑思维。

雅思阅卷人看作文时在看什么 写作时这三点帮你从容应对

雅思写作一直是很多中国考生的软肋。雅思写作要求考生在1小时内用英文分别完成150字和250字的作文,这对很多同学来说都是不小的挑战。

然而既然写作不像阅读和听力那样有正确或错误的答案,雅思阅卷人在评判雅思写作时依据什么进行评判?又看重哪些方面呢?

雅思阅卷人都经过专门的训练,他们会从四个方面来评估你的作文。

708_180822163028jnbYc5nMVk6b8MnS.png

第一个方面是写作任务完成情况(Task Achievement/Task response),主要是看你是否回答了问题,包括小作文部分是否完成了规定的内容,并写满150词,以及大作文部分是否回应了问题,并写满250个词。大作文部分,阅卷人具体会看你的作文是否涉及题目的所有内容,你是否采用了足够的论据支持自己的论点,你所写的内容是否都和题目相关,等等。

第二个方面是文章的一致性和连贯性(Coherence and Cohesion),主要看你是否很好地表达了自己的想法,以及这些想法是否很好地联系在一起。阅卷人具体会考虑,你的文章是否易懂,文章结构是否合理,段落间的联系是否清晰,等等。

第三个方面是词汇使用情况(Lexical Resource),考查你的词汇量,以及是否在文中准确有效地使用了这些词语。

第四个方面是语法使用情况(Grammatical Range),是否准确有效地运用了丰富的语法结构。

后三方面是基于大家平时对词汇和语法的掌握,以及大量的写作练习。第一个标准则更多考查学生对于现场题目的把握,是否能够读懂题目、正确理解题目要求。这一点也可以通过雅思写作的大量练习,总结出应对同一类题目的文章结构以及连接方式。

要想雅思写作考试取得好的成绩,还可以从改进考试的应对方式做起。

首先阅读并充分理解题目要求。很多考生考后才发现自己理解错了题意,追悔莫及。其次,在写作前仔细规划。由于考试时间很短,一般建议小作文用时不超过20分钟,给大作文留有足够的时间。完成大作文时,应根据题目规划好段落安排。第三,写完以后留出足够的时间检查拼写、语法这些基础内容,比如单复数是否正确?时态是否正确?最后的检查可以帮助你避免一些低级错误。

考官最讨厌的十种雅思写作开头!

一、中式英语

讨厌指数:★★★★★

上榜理由:用中式英文开头,不仅会让考官看不懂,还暴露了你的语言功底,语料积累匮乏,是雅思写作中的大忌。

比如:

写作主题 1:The happiest moment in your life

案例:In our life, there are always some moments which make your heart flower opened angrily……

写作主题 2:The population problem

案例:The population problem is a very big problem. For example, in the city centers of Shanghai, we can always see people mountain people sea there.

写作主题 3:Is there fairness in today’s business world?

案例:I think in today’s society, there is no fairness in the business world. For example, I always chopped when I go out buy things……

二、胡乱翻译中国俗语

讨厌指数:★★★★★

上榜理由:胡乱翻译中国俗语会起反作用,毕竟考官对中国俗语并不“感冒”,反而会引起考官反感。

比如:

写作主题 1:Is it good to have a large family?

案例:I think it is good to have a large family. Because we Chinese believe a sentence: “Many sons, many lucks”……

写作主题 2:Do you think one’s character is greatly influenced by his/her family?

案例:Chinese old words says very good: Dragon born dragon, phoenix born phoenix, rat’s son can make hole……

写作主题 3:The advantage of being a nice person

案例:I believe one sentence:“A good person is all life safe”. We Chinese people always say: “Good has good pay, bad has bad pay”.

三、超级啰嗦

讨厌指数:★★★★☆

上榜理由:开篇就要主题明了清晰,上来就啰啰嗦嗦表达不清,考官自然认为你的观点模糊,甚至不会表达。

比如:

写作主题 1:Should college students be allowed to get married?

案例:This topic is very interesting. I’m very interested in talking about this topic. Because I’m also a college student and I’m not married……

写作主题 2:Will modern technology, such as the Internet, ever replace the book or the writing word as the sole source of information?

案例:Ok, this topic is a very good topic. First, let me tell you a story: I have a friend, he likes go on the internet very much. Every day, he uses internet to read news or play internet games. So we can see the internet is more and more important in our daily life.

四、偏离主题

讨厌指数:★★★★☆

上榜理由:文不对题自然会扣分,给考官留下的印象就是跑题,想想整体写作分数还会高么?

比如:

写作主题:It is said that nowadays one can‘t acquire the qualifications and quality essential to success through university education. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

案例:I think to success, we must have a lot of important qualities. To have these important qualities, we must learn a lot of things, for example, English, music tools, and etc. We can learn these qualities from our teachers, our friends and from books. All in all, we can learn from many places.

五、观点不明朗

讨厌指数:★★★☆☆

上榜理由:雅思大作文很重要的一点就是你的逻辑性和观点,如果观点都不明确,后面的举例证明等都会缺乏说服力,自然分数也不会高。

比如:

写作主题:Should college students be allowed to get married?

案例:I think this topic is very hard to say. Because I am still very little,only 17, and not married, so this topic is very difficult for me……

六、语法错误不断

讨厌指数:★★★☆☆

上榜理由:涉及到雅思写作评分标准中的语法多样性和准确性,语法错误不断自然会成为扣分点。

比如:

写作主题:If children behave badly, should their parents acceptresponsibility and also be punished?

案例:About this problem, my think is if children behave badly, then parents arenot right. Because teach child is parent’s responsibility.

七、意思重复

讨厌指数:★★★☆☆

上榜理由:反复重复一个意思,让考官会觉得你并没有什么可以表达的,或者词汇表达能力有限,自然也会扣分。

比如:

写作主题:Your opinion on DINK families

案例:My opinion on DINK families is that DINK families is not a good thing. And it is a bad thing. It brings no benefits to our society and it is even sometimes harmful to our society.

八、观点绝对化

讨厌指数:★★★☆☆

上榜理由:考生在使用语言描述事物或者表达自己的观点时,应尽可能避免语言过于绝对化,更应该注意该语言中非绝对化表达方式的学习,这样才能尽显文章内容的客观性。

比如:

写作主题 1:The importance of confidence

案例:In my opinion, confidence is the most important thing for a person. All the successful people in the world are full of confidence. While those people who don’t have confidence, they all have failed.

写作主题 2:The solution to the traffic problem

案例:I think to solve the traffic problem, very easy! For those who don’t obey the traffic rules, we should put all of them into prison. If we do that, I’m sure there will be no traffic problem any more.

九、内容过分简单

讨厌指数:★★☆☆☆

上榜理由:考官想给你打分都没有内容,所以切记尽量丰富内容,尤其不要照搬题目。

比如:

写作主题:The importance of environmental protection

案例:This issue is surely very important, let’s talk about it!

十、用词不当

讨厌指数:★★☆☆☆

上榜理由:用词不当会暴露你的词汇,而且评分标准中谈到“在不同的语境中,使用正确的词性;”所以在使用词汇的时候,正确性也是非常重要的。如果想要取得更高的分数,那么词汇的多样性也要更多的纳入考虑。切记,不要用口语化的表达!

比如:

写作主题 1:The importance of confidence

案例:In my opinion, confidence is the most important thing for a person. All the successful people in the world are full of confidence. While those people who don’t have confidence, they all have failed.

写作主题 2:The solution to the traffic problem

案例:I think to solve the traffic problem, very easy! For those who don’t obey the traffic rules, we should put all of them into prison. If we do that, I’m sure there will be no traffic problem any more.

总结

1.开头切记不要用中式英语表达,多积累地道的英语表达。

2.表达的观点要客观明确,切勿模棱两可绝对化。

3.内容要清晰明了,切勿反复啰嗦,也不能一句话代之。

4.注意词性使用,减少语法错误,不要生搬硬套“华丽辞藻”。